butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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