On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Randomize
