So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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