what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
