this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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