we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
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