I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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