WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
