I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I am midnight drunk by noon
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I know her cup size but not her name....
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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