Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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