i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Randomize
