i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize