i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
whose parrot is this?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Randomize