At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
