I'm laying in your front yard are you home
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
Randomize