I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Randomize