My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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