She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
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