i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
