I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
