you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
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