Don't you send me to vm
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
