I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I will pee on everything he values.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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