Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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