3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
My bed smells like the plague
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