Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
