I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I know her cup size but not her name....
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