I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Randomize
