I just saw a hot homeless man
Have you ever been so weak from sleep you couldn't push your poo out?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
