: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
