Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
