i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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