this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
