his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
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