You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
