I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
