Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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