How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
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