It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
sex in a hospital.. check
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Randomize