hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
do herpes really smell.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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