What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I'm sober. Being kissed by a chick with a llama puppet. Shoot me now.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
Randomize