Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I think a kid would responsible me up
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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