Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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