It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
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