They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize