tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
Randomize
