I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
