This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
