just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
