Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize
