Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
handjob tips. give me some.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
