Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
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