I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
