You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
